Something just for me

When you are a homeschool mom, there really is no such thing as “me time”. My entire day, every day, is lived around the needs of my kiddos. Right now, they are ages 9, 7, 6 and 3. Which means there is an ever present need for adult supervision. Translated: I’m with them from the time my hubby goes to work until they finally go to sleep. 

I love my kiddos. I love homeschooling. I also love getting lost in a project without interruption. At least, I think I do. It’s been so long…

I don’t want to lose myself in my family. One day, the kids will grow up and have families of their own, and it will just be me and the hubby. I need to hold onto my sense of self, because I will need it again. Someday. 

So I’m looking to add something to our lives (No, not another baby… I’m getting too old for that). Something just for me. I’m not sure what it is, or how it will come about. But I need this. Whatever ‘this’ proves to be. 

What do you do, just for yourself?

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4 thoughts on “Something just for me

  1. I think that when my kids were little–that was my entire life: family. I barely had time to myself. Now that my kids are way more independent..my youngest is 9 1/2…I have more time to “find myself”. Recently I started reading again. I always have loved researching things (esp. being a homeschool mom with special needs). I’m learning how to cook more Paleo diet type foods. My daughter has a dairy allergy so most of it is based on her health, but I also would like to feel better about my health. I’m working on incorporating more movement so I’ll take hour breaks from the house and just go for a walk; or I’ll take all my kids to the pond and we’ll just watch ducks. Kind of boring, but peaceful. I started reading more historical books because I found that i really like history–not the boring “here’s how you pass a law” stuff, but more of the people’s lives from our past. I find them fascinating, especially the books and stories you never heard of in history class in school. My husband and I go on short dates every Friday to our favorite hangs. We at least have an hour to talk and eat good food. It’s nice. I also enjoy blogging, of course. I like to study about body mechanics (especially since I have a lot of back problems) and just read a book in an hour about feet. HA HA! I tried to paint, but I am too much of a perfectionist. Have you ever heard of the “movement” on social media called Giveit100? It’s to practice something to better yourself for 100 days. I saw it on Instagram and it looked interesting. People post 20 second videos of themselves playing guitar, drawing, exercising, ect. It’s a way to commit to something for 100 days to see if you are any good at it. I might try it. But I have too many things I would like to learn–hard to know where to start! I do think that when our kids are little, it’s ok to not have a ton of hobbies. We are raising kids that need us. It won’t last forever. Maybe try to incorporate things you love to do with your kids. I also think if they see you spending time on something you love, they’ll get the idea that they can do that too, even if it’s only 10 minutes. It’s hard to feel like you are a person when you are all about your kids, but now my kids are older, they don’t want as much to do with me and its a little sad. I do enjoy the free time, but I also miss holding them in my lap, reading to them. They are too big for that now. We still read together. It’s just not like it was. They do grow up fast, but when you are in the midst of it, it doesn’t seem that way.

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    1. I used to be addicted to having hobbies… I’m a classically trained pianist, so when all else fails, I sit at the piano… If the kiddos let me play;)
      I went through the master gardener training last year, but I didn’t get all of my volunteer hours in, so technically I’m just a gardener;)

      I feel like too much of what I’ve taken up in the past was to satisfy a need for approval . Like, “look at me! Look what I can do!” As a recovering over-achiever, I want something just for me. Not something to blog about or post photos of… I’m like a recovering addict that way. I can’t let myself fall back into that pattern. I was busy all of the time to fight a feeling of emptiness. While I don’t feel empty anymore, I do fear that my knee-jerk reaction might be to return to that old pattern. It seems totally harmless on the surface. But I know better.

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  2. I have been going through the same problem! I decided to look into graduate school that I can do online, but finding an accredited one is a challenge. In the meantime, I do courses on Coursera that I find interesting and take them for free. I love that there is no pressure to finish the class, since I didn’t pay for it, but it’s something interesting to do when the kids go to bed. I also looked on volunteermatch.org and signed up to do some easy volunteering for my area as well as online options that I can do from home. I, too, was addicted to hobbies pre-kids and I think not having “something” that is just for me actually makes me a worse mom. Good luck finding your niche!

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